Mourning the death of common sense

A critcal look at today's decling standards

MOURNING THE DEATH

OF COMMON SENSE

Today we mourn the passing of an old friend, by the name of Common Sense.

Common Sense lived a long life but died from heart failure early in the new millennium. No one really knows how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in the bureaucratic red tape.

He selflessly devoted his life to service in schools, hospitals, homes, factories and offices, helping people get jobs done without fanfare and foolishness.

For decades, petty rules, silly laws and frivolous lawsuits held no power over Common Sense. He was credited with cultivating such valued lessons as to know when to come in out of the rain, the early bird gets the worm, and life isn't always fair.

Common sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn), reliable parenting strategies (the adults are in charge, not the kids), and it's okay to come in second (or even last), as long as you do your best.

A veteran of the industrial revolution, the depression, and the technological evolution, Common Sense survived cultural and education trends including body piercing, estuary English and comprehensive schools. In recent decades his waning strength proved no match for the ravages of overbearing regulations.

He watched in pain as good people became ruled by self-seeking lawyers. His health rapidly deteriorated when schools were forced to appear in meaningless league tables, report six year-old boys for sexual harassment for kissing a classmate, yet tolerate unruly students.

It declined even further when schools had to get parental consent to administer aspirin to a student, but cannot inform the parent when the female student is pregnant or wants an abortion. Finally, Common Sense lost his will to live as The Ten Commandments became contraband, churches became businesses, and criminals received better treatment than victims.

Finally a woman who was stupid enough not to realise that coffee is hot, and was awarded a huge pay-out for her stupidity, caused Common Sense to finally throw in the towel.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Reason, his wife discretion, his daughter Responsibility, and his son Reason. He is survived by two stepbrothers; My Rights and Ima Whiner. Not many attended his funeral because so few realised he was gone.

Submitted by MA White

M A White