SOME PUNNY PHRASES

Y hipe you like puns!

Those who jump off a Paris bridge .... are in Seine.

A backward poet writes .... inverse.

A man's home is his castle .... in a manor of speaking.

Practice safe eating ..... always use a condiment.

A shotgun wedding .... is a matter of wife or death.

A man needs a mistress .... just to break the monogamy.

A hangover .... is the wrath of grapes.

Dancing cheek-to-cheek .... is a form of floor play.

Does the name Pavlov .... ring a bell?

Reading while sunbathing ..... can make you well red.

When two egotists converse .... it's an I for an I.

A bicycle can't stand on its own ..... because it is too tired.

In a democracy your vote counts .... in feudalism your count votes.

She was engaged to a boyfriend with a wooden leg .... until she broke it off.

A chicken crossing the road .... is poultry in motion.

Pay your exorcist .... or you may get repossessed.

With her marriage .... she got a new name and a dress.

When a clock is hungry .... it goes back four seconds.

You are stuck in debt .... when you can't budge it.

Local Area Network in Australia ... is the LAN down under.

He often broke into song .... because he couldn't find the key.

Every calendar's days .... are numbered.

A hard-boiled egg for breakfast .... is hard to beat.

He had a photographic memory ... that was never developed.

A plateau .... is a high form of flattery.

A midget fortune-teller who escapes from jail .... is a small medium at large.

Get too big for your britches .... and you'll be exposed in the end.

Once you've seen one shopping centre .... you've seen a mall.

Bakers swap bread recipes ... on a knead the dough basis.

Revd Matt Finch