Christmas Cracker Jokes.....

Some smiles for Christmas

Evidence has been found that William Tell and his family were avid bowlers. However, all the league records were unfortunately destroyed in a fire. Thus we'll never know for whom the Tells bowled.

A man rushed into the doctor's office and shouted, "Doctor! I think I'm

shrinking!" The doctor calmly responded, "Now, settle down. You'll just have to be a little patient."

A skeptical anthropologist was cataloguing South American folk-remedies

with the assistance of a tribal witch doctor who indicated that the leaves of a particular fern were a sure cure for any case of constipation. When the anthropologist expressed his doubts, the witch doctor looked him in the eye and said, "Let me tell you, with fronds like these, who needs enemas?

A thief broke into the local police station and stole all the toilets. A

spokesperson was quoted as saying, "We have absolutely nothing to go on."

A famous Viking explorer returned home from a voyage and found his name

missing from the town register. His wife insisted on complaining to the local civic official who apologized profusely saying, "I must have taken Leif off my census."

There were three Indian squaws. One slept on a deer skin, one slept on an elk skin and the third slept on a hippopotamus skin. All three became pregnant and the first two each had a baby boy. The one who slept on the hippopotamus skin had twin boys. This goes to prove that the squaw on the hippopotamus is equal to the sons of the squaws on the other two hides.

Editor

Ray Thompson