A SECOND COMING

Les looks at life in 2005 through the eyes of a teenager, with some startling results!

Some would say our young people are sending us much older folk to the very edge of total exasperation. It seems that what interest them is drugs, vandalism and sex; at least this is what some would have us believe.

I just wonder however if I could wave the magic wand and wake up tomorrow morning and find I'm aged 16 years of age, and discover I'm just your average Methwold teenager, just as I was the first time around. Maybe I would like to think I would shortly be off to University, but I didn't go the first time round, so why now? Last time I wanted to play football for Norwich City, but had to be content with our village team, at least we had a Saturday team then today so I hear we haven't even got that.

At 16 I would now have said good-bye to the High School and found myself a job at Darby's which is a bit of an improvement from last time when I spent some of my time looking after the chaff at threshing time, happy days indeed.

So on my second time around I find it's Saturday night and thanks to Darby's I've got a pound or two in my pocket having given Mother the odd pound or so for my board. Now I'm ready to sample the social life here at Methwold. One or two of the village ladies don't seem to be giving me the admiring glances that I think they should. I think they look rather appealing, but regretfully I find this is not a view which is reciprocated. I have this strange feeling it was the same the first time around I had hoped things might have changed.

It's a lovely summer's night as I walk on to the Recreation Ground where it's all happening. What's happening? Well nothing really. Last time around I seem to recall a cricket club and a tennis court on the Rec. but not this time. I make a mental note of spending some of my hard earned cash on a donkey after all there's enough hay on the Rec. to feed it for a year. I notice some of my ex school chums are about. What they are doing is anyone's guess, not having sex I hope, there's more to life than that even if at this stage I haven't found out what it is.

With that I shuffle off to the Social Club where I can have the odd glass of beer etc. Now just a minute! Sex on the Rec. from what I'm told, beer at the Social Club, I had better watch it if not I shall be on the slippery slope.

Confidence now at a all time high thanks to the beer at the Social Club I wander back to the Rec. and approach Miss Jones with the cinema at Feltwell in mind. She ignores me as if I'm not there and Ron standing around doing nothing tells me the cinema closed at Feltwell some 50 years ago. Ron who seems a mind of information also tells me the bus to Brandon cinema which first time round ran every Wednesday and Friday, well there aren't any buses and what's more there isn't even a cinema.

This second coming doesn't seem to be working. If anything, life for a teenager seems to be more boring than it was when I was around the first time. No, I was a teenager once and once is enough for me so I think I'll keep my magic wand under lock and key, the same place where I shall keep my criticism of our young.

Les Lawrence