Runnin' On

Janet tells us of Toby the cat's problems with the wind and complains about the January sales

The winds have been blowing really hard this week, and Toby is not too happy about it. Every time he puts his head down for a well earned kip, the wind blows, the letter box rattles and he has to be back on his feet to repel boarders. This was not the life the human Tilburn people promised. What ever happened to all the treats, the stroked fur and the happy cuddles? If truth is known, they seem to be given to mother Janet and she hasn't caught a single mouse since Toby has been here. Toby thinks big Mr T has favourites, and he doesn't mean those rotten birds who he built those lousy nest boxes for.

The weather has also kept the Tilburn humans inside, warm and snug before the fire. Even the promises of 70% off sales could not persuade us out of the house. But just what does 70% mean? If you look very closely at these flashy signs, you will see a small, insignificant couple of words that change the whole meaning: UP TO! All the things we might want are obviously in the UP TO category. That lovely sweater I wanted had only 10% off and the new garage wear, so coveted by Mr T had a wapping 15% off; but not 70"%.

Even the supermarkets are at it. Massive savings across the range, one of them screamed when last we ventured out. But who wants pig's eyes in aspic jelly? Not us, that is for sure. When I was a girl I visited a butcher's shop with my mother and saw a pigs head with an apple in its mouth; now that I am a little older I realise pigs don't walk around with apples in their mouths, it was just another marketing gimmick. Then there's the drink! Mr T was positively drooling when he say Foster's Lager, £7.50, buy two and save £3. But again, when you looked at it there were four less tins in each carton and the price had only been reduced by the price of two cans. He still bought it though, saying "You never know when we might get visitors!"

I hope you have all found plenty of bargains and are sitting comfortably at home counting the cash you have saved. Or have you just bought a bit more and spent the same amount? Happy shopping.

Janet Tilburn